12 deployment tips for every couple

A reader wrote in asking for tips to make it through a deployment when you aren’t married and/or the unit doesn’t have a strong (or any sort of) support group, such as an FRG.

While I was lucky and have been a part of great FRGs where I made great friends, each FRG is different, and it may not provide the support you need or want. And that’s okay.

I’ve reached out to a few of my friends who have been through trainings and deployments alike in both these scenarios to get their best tips. I’ve also compiled some general tips to help get through anytime apart, with or without official channels in place, and with or without a marriage certificate.

More Than A military spouse
I dabbled in Pinterest projects during deployment – including making pinata cookies. Photo by Jessica Hall.

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Learning to live together…again

When James returned from deployment it was pure joy. But we’ve both had to give and get from each other to make sure that living together still goes well. Things have definitely changed in our lives since before deployment so figuring out new schedules and chores can cause some bumps in the road. Here are some things we’ve been doing to ease those bad days and make them all good:

Photo by Jessica Hall
Photo by Jessica Hall

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Deployment Habits Die Hard

I know you’re probably like whaaaaaat? But yeah it’s true. There are some habits that I picked up while the hubby was gone that I find myself needing/wanting to do. They aren’t terrible habits, more like patterns of life I fell into during the months he was gone. Be it how to go about my day or just things I like to do.

Here’s what I find myself doing now that I’m used to him being home. Continue reading “Deployment Habits Die Hard”

The joys of homecoming

I wrote last week about how the last days of deployment were long. Really long. But today I can tell you with 100% certainty that having your loved one home is absolutely amazing. I can’t even describe how great it felt to see him again, and spend time with him. I first saw him on a video screen, watching the Soldiers come off the plane at the airfield, and squealed with joy. Then I waited a really long time (read: the Soldiers then had to fill out a bunch of paperwork and stuff, then deal with crazy traffic to meet up with the families on the other side of JBLM). I spotted him walking in the formation in, I hardly heard the words of the chaplain or commander releasing them.

Me with my sign. Photo courtesy of Jessica Hall

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The longest days of deployment

As you read this I am spending some quality time with the hubby, for the first time in about 8 months. I am writing this prior to his homecoming ceremony because between his return and Thanksgiving, I may not be able to blog for a few days. But while I’m sure there are a lot of emotions going through my head right now as I hug and kiss him for the first time in what feels like forever, the days leading up to it were loong. So looooong.

Circle banner hung on the mantle with care. Photo by Jessica Hall
Circle banner hung on the mantle with care. Photo by Jessica Hall

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Stressed until the end

When I found out when my husband was due home I was ecstatic, but the stress and anxiety that has gone along with him being gone, hasn’t gone away. And I don’t think it will until he’s home.

At a recent event for spouses in our brigade prepping for redeployment (homecoming) we talked about the reintegration after they come home, what to expect and look for, but the chaplain asked one question that has stuck with me, “When will you stop holding your breath?” we all answered: “When we’re holding each other here in our arms.”

We’ll probably be this happy when we see each other again. Photo © Casey Fatchett – www.fatchett.com

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